In the summer of 2005, when I was about 18 months into the first clinical depression of my life (and hopefully my last), I created a performance that tracked my journey, and looked ahead to the future. Even though I wasn't feeling it at the time, the show ended on a hopeful, celebratory note.
Anyway, the opening scene, based on Robert Bly's translation of a poem by Rainer Maria Rilke, was a pre-recorded video segment that remains one of my favorites, now 6 years later and light-years beyond where I was then, emotionally, spiritually, interpersonally. And yet, as the poem alludes, I live my life in circles, coming back to ideas and thoughts and behavioral patterns I had seemingly moved beyond. The difference is now that I'm visiting them again, I recognize them for better or worse, and am able to respond in ways that reflect my present self. The circles, die "vachsenden ringen" are growing ones; I go travel further and more broadly over my exterior and interior landscapes alike.
I'll always be grateful for the partnership of my friend and videographer, Bob Nolty, who not only shot the footage, but so completely understood my idea for this segment that I loved it at his first edit.
Here's to recognizing our own growth and continuing the questioning journey.
